Makin the Grade

I have a best friend, for now will call her Cody. I met her about ten years ago when she was pregnant with her first child. She asked me if I would be her best friend and I said yes, we've been together ever since. Have you ever met someone and just looking at them for a split second, you realize you have to know that person better? Now don't get me wrong it wasn't all love at first site it was more like hey this is a kindred spirit kinda thing, all Anne of Green Gables and what not. She understood me, which is saying alot most people don't get me at all, even when they try to. I dont think I'm all that complicated, but of course my opinion is somewhat biased. Anyhoo the years rolled by and everything was awesome I'd never felt so in touch with anyone like that before, then she met and married a guy, that's where it all went bad. He was a crack addict woohoo!!! Dont we know how to pick 'em. She was with him for four years . She finally go away from him, now scarred and with four kids to raise on her own. Everything seemed like it was back on track and we were closer than ever, then the dating started. For the last two years she's had a new boyfriend ever 3-6 months (sigh). I dont begrudge her dating it's not that I'm jealous of her time, although I think it's bad for the kids( ya know the whole tilt-a-whirl thing). The problem is she just drops out of my life completely to spend time with the new love of her life, and yes according to her she's been in love with everyone of the meatbags. Then when they break-up, as they inevitably do she reappears and wedges herself up my ass without a howdy, sorry I've been gone, I don't even warrant an explanation these days. I call she blows me off, for weeks at a time and then when she needs me I'm just supposed to 'be there'. I may not be a perfect friend, but I think I deserve a little more than that after all these years. Some small part of me says I should just let go, yet I never seem able to. Perhaps, it's just another one of those endless cycles and I've somehow allowed myself to become a victim.
"I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar." Robert Brault

How Many Licks Does It Take...............

I read an article on the Lifetime network site today about insurance companies and mastectomies. When a women has a mastectomy the send her home in less than 24 hours. This is AFTER they cut off a body part, not to be crude, but it's the truth. Lifetime currently is getting signatures for a petition to send to the government, in order to get them involved and force insurance companies to standardize a minimum 48 hour stay after a mastectomy. You to can sign this petition at lifetimetv.com, just type in petition in the search box. Anyone readin my blog today, do this for your mom, your grandma, your aunt, your cousin, your niece, but most importantly, DO IT FOR YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!
Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference."
-- Unknown

Essence of Me

I have to admit here, I voted for Bush his first term. Honestly, I only voted for him because I thought Al Gore was a putz. When election time rolled around this year I had intended to vote for Bush again, but the I realized I didnt agree with a single thing he had to say. I'm a democrat thru and thru. I was raised in a Pentecostal church and I suppose it never occured to me ( 'til recently), that I had just been mimicking my parents all these years. All this time I havent been going to church, because I think organized religion is a disgrace to God and his teaching. Priests molesting altar boys, people that talk about you behind your back, doing things for social acceptance, well I might as well just go back to high school...or a bar if thats what I wanted. I know now that I was voting republican and joining the masses who believe in every thing I dont. Who knew it would take me so long to wake up and smell the doo doo!!

"To believe in something, and not to live it, is dishonest." Author: Mahatma Gandhi

Call to all Democrats!

This is beautiful!! I was perusing Wil Wheaton's blog today at www.wilwheaton.net (for those interested). Good 'ol Wil has a link on his site that lets you send a message to President Bush and you can also make a donation to the democratic party. Now, for all you democrats out there, like me, who think the the prez elect is a f**kbag, this is the place to visit. Let's make our voices heard!! After all it will be us and our children paying for his mistakes long after he's gone. I say we send a strong message, NO MORE. No more war, no more crap, no more discrimination, no more no bid contracts with Halliburton, NO MORE!

"War is a poor chisel to carve out tomorrow. "Author: Martin Luther King, Jr.

Response to Baghdad Burning

Today I read the blog Baghdad Burning, at least enough to feel it warranted comment. First Id like to say as an American citizen, that I am truly sorry for all the death this has caused, on both sides. I did not vote for Bush> I know people who did and people who didnt. All the people that didnt vote for Bush are the ones that knew what he was about and didnt agree. After the events of 9-11 our country was scared and angry, we wanted someone to pay for the lives lost preferably Osama Bin Laden who was believed to be the leader of the organisation that attacked us. When Bush couldnt give the american people Bin Laden, he decided to give us Sadam Hussein. While I tend to agree that Hussein was a schlump, I am certain things could have been done a better way, without the loss of so many lives. There is no excuse for the actions taken against innocent people, war is never a good response in my opinion. Now, dont get me wrong Im not some freak that thinks we shouldnt defend ourselves, I have found from personal experience that violence never solves a problem, it only makes it bigger. Once again to the people of Iraq who have lost loved ones in this war, I extend my sympathy, truly you have been wronged.

Emily Dickinson "Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul. And sings the tune without the words, and never stops at all".

Tsunami Relief

Well it's not like the tsunami is any big secret, and I have to say I'm thrilled to see everyone pulling together to help out. To many people ignore what's going on around them, interested in only helping themselves. This disaster is a wake up call. It shows that by working together we can accomplish much. I am happy to see all the relief aid thats being sent over, even famous names such as, Sandra Bullock are pitching in to help. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside to find out the world isnt quite as self-centered as I thought it was!!

Shakespeare "How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a weary world".

Family

My grandma passed away three days before Christmas. Since, I dedicated this blog to her, I thought it fitting that I say a few essentials things about her. My grandma was a very quiet, reserved kind of person, as a child I actually thought she didn't like me. I found out in later years, that was just her way. She never complained when she was sick, broke, tired, (usually of screaming children Im sure), she just accepted all. Now, in her passing, I realize how much she truly loved us. I can only hope I'm half the woman she was someday. My Mom seems to be taking this the hardest of anyone, maybe it's because she's the baby, or just that I know her better than other members of my family and the grief is more clearly read. I wish there was something I could say to comfort her, but there isn't. Although, whether I'm dealing with my grief seems cloudy in my mind. It's entirely possible I'm in denial and sometime in the near future it will hit me like a mack truck, who knows. I surely don't, but I do know my grandma was much loved, and will be sorely missed.

Helen Keller "It is for us to pray not for tasks equal to our powers, but for powers equal to our tasks."

Christmas Gifts

My best friend got me a Polar Bear sno cone machine for Christmas this year!!! I know it sounds crazy for a person my age to want that, but Ive been waiting for it for years. I've always loved sno cones, dont know why, it's just one of those things. Well, several years ago my friend got me one for Christmas, only problem was, I never got it. Her kids swiped it and of course with them being fairly young what could I say? I didnt begrudge them the sno cone maker I wouldnt be much of an auntie if I did. This time around my friend got it together and the machine made it to me, now I can have sno cones whenever I want, instead of waiting 'til we go to the zoo in the summer. YEAH!!!!

Pets!

I have four cats. Yeah, I know, seems like alot, but they keep me company when Im home alone. I know alot of people that have cats or dogs, and they pet them, feed them and then just send 'em outside and when they get hit by a car, they're like well it was just a dog, I can get another. I must say I cant begin to fathom that sort of attitude, why bother having a pet if it doesnt mean anything to you? My pets are just like my close friends, extended members of the family. I would grieve for them the same way I would anyone else. I suppose alot of people out there would say that was ignorant, of course those are the people that let their animals run around outside close to a busy road.

Things 'N' Things

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart. I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; And because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.
Helen Keller. I put these quotes in today because they have special meaning; if a blind and deaf woman can learn to read and write, is there really anything we cannot do? Sometimes life gets me down, it happens to everyone at some point or other, but then I remember Helen Keller and the amazing things she accomplished, far beyond anything I can imagine. That is the moment I remember, there are many people in the world much worse off than me. Rather than feeling sorry for myself I should be extending a hand, by improving the quality of life for another person, there can be no doubt that it will improve the quality of mine.

Controversy

I've decided I might as well just get this one out of the way. The Presidential Election!!! Yep that's right gonna tackle the big mamma jamma, gotta start things proper. First off I'd just like to say that our fabulous president elect is a stinky poo poo head. Now, don't get me wrong, Bush isnt the bad guy or anything, but come on what's this Halliburton no bid contract nonsense? We send poor 'ol Martha Stewart off to jail for a bit O' insider trading, but it's ok for the prez to engage in dishonest business practices? Ok, ok you got me, I voted for Kerry, and why should'nt I? I wan't my husband to get a better job, preferably without moving to India. Yeah ok so maybe Bush isnt the one who initiated this whole send our jobs overseas dookie, but from where Im sitting, I dont see him doing anything to stop it either. Of course, we cant forget the whole gay marriage issue. Call me anti-nazi, anti-segragation, call me what you will, but I see no difference. It's all just a form of predjudice and hatred. Who are we to judge? I will concede that marriage is a religious ideal, but civil unions shouldnt just get tossed out of the window. When our forefathers wrote up the Bill of Rights Im pretty sure it never said" to the pursuit of happiness", unless your gay. One consoling thought to this is that Bush cant run again, I can only hope that we arent so far in debt by then that we'll have to be sold off as slaves to pay for our governments spending!!!!

Afterthought

I have left my blog open for comments, and I just wanted to say to all you commenters out there Please Be Nice!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Any and all opinions expressed in my blog are just that, opinions. While I will appreciate any and all feedback, things are only open for DEBATE not arguement. Please keep that in mind when responding. Thanx

A New Year

Well, this isn't my first blog, it's my second. Somewhere along the line, I forgot my user name and password to my other blog. So, since it's a new year I decided it was time for a new start. The last year has been really rough around here. I should have known when my puppy died things were going to get ugly, but like they always say hindsight is 20/20. I suppose between cars breaking down, being broke, my grams passing away, and being sick myself, I should just be happy to start fresh. At the same time, I've learned alot in the last year, about my family, my friends, and most of all myself. I guess that's why I titled my blog life without chocolate, as if I could imagine such a thing, (cringe); what I finally realized there are some things you can do without, and some things you can't. What is there you can't live without you say? Many things, good husbands, that never get mad, no matter how annoying you are, grandmas that say how cute it is when you shave your head, while the rest of your family gapes open mouthed in horror, warm fuzzy kitties to cuddle when you're sick, best friends who drop everything at a moments noticeand pay $90 for babysitting to come to you grandma's funeral, and chocolate to make you happy. My new years resolution is to have more patience, patience with all the people I love that usually drive me crazy, but whom I cant live without. Besides, why make some crazy new years resolution like, stop smoking or lose weight, it never works so why bother. I just want to be a better person, like my grandma. Grandma this blog is for you, I know you and grandpa are watching me up in heaven and I just want to make you proud, and for all the people reading this, whatever you believe in, Allah, Krishna, Buddha, God, whatever, may all your prayers be answered this new year!